Movie Review: Creepshow

Creepshow (1982 Warner Bros. Dir. George A. Romero)

How does one begin to talk about Creepshow? I have to do an above the fold description, but it’s hard to know where to begin. This is a strange celebration of so many things that established wisdom says is bad for you. The horror comics of the E.C. era, anthology films, and of cheap and dirty storytelling. See, anthology movies never work. So says Hollywood. Argument not without some merit, as they rarely find an audience, thus they have poor box office and are difficult to manage artistically. The horror comic scare of demented perverts like Fredric Wertham* are the reason wanna be lawmakers even today try to demonize funny books. And even the short stories that these tales are based on are looked down on by snooty critics who can’t find any merit is works that people might actually enjoy reading. This is just a big bowl of everything that’s bad for you. I guess that’s why it’s so darn good. This is King and Romero doing their best scary-fun work.

*I’m just saying, no one ever though Batman and Robin were gay until this guy pointed it out. We also didn’t know Plastic Man was a phallic reference before him, or that Wonder Woman was a lesbian slut or that Superman was an un-American fascist. The guy was deranged, and a seriously shitty researcher to boot. I honestly can’t decry the fuckbag enough.

Movie Review: Tales from the Crypt

Tales from the Crypt (1972 Amicus Productions Dir. Freddie Francis)

Tales from the Crypt! No, not this Tales from the Crypt, nor this one, not even that one that had Dennis Miller in it, but the 1972 UK movie. The Stories are based on the old EC comics though, just not all of them are from Tales. One is from The Vault of Horror, two are from The Haunt of Fear and two are from Tales from the Crypt. However, as they were all owned by EC Comics, I'm sure it doesn't matter. Most the guys who actually wrote the stories that these short films were based on worked on all three comics so there was a lot of cross pollination and I'm sure it really didn't matter too much which comic they actually got published in as long as there was money involved. Hell, since The Old Witch, Vault Keeper and the Crypt Keeper kept showing up in all three titles, I'm pretty sure any given artist or writer had no idea what title would end up being slapped on any given book on any given day! “Enough history!” I hear you cry out. “What about the movie?”

TV Review: An Evening of Edgar Allan Poe

An Evening of Edgar Allan Poe (1972 AIP Dir. Kenneth Johnson)


Okay, so I’m cheating a little here. This isn’t really a movie, so much as it’s a TV special, and it’s not even a proper narrative because it’s actually a one man show. Vincent Price recites four Edgar Allan Poe stories. In order they are… The Tell-Tale Heart, The Sphinx, The Cask of Amontillado and The Pit and the Pendulum. If I seem to be a bit short on explanation, that’s because that’s really all this is. It’s a 53 minute made for TV special that probably bumped I Dream of Jeannie for a week. There isn’t a hell of a lot to say about this.

Doesn’t mean I won’t fill a few pages with wit and snark though. Come on! Let’s tear into this baby. Who’s with me?

And now another episode of "That Really Happened"

Did you know there was a western with an all-midget cast?

Not a joke.

It was called The Terror of Tiny Town.

...

That really happened.

They really made a midget western.

I have not exaggerated one bit. Look, I've got the poster and everything.



You KNOW my photoshop-fu is non-existent.

Jed Buell woke up one morning (one presumes in a whiskey fog) in 1938 and actually said "I know! I'll make a western with a bunch of the guys who are going to be munchkins in The Wizard of Oz. AWESOME!"
And instead of just waiting for the booze to stop talking, he went ahead and made it. And then... for some strange reason, he allowed it to lapse into the public domain, so I can provide a link where you can download it for free! Completely legal too.

You can watch the whole thing right now.



However, if you want it on DVD (and why wouldn't you?) you can buy it. Yes, the internet has allowed us the ability to actually own The Terror of Tiny Town on DVD.

Movie Review: Stephen King’s Cat’s Eye

Well! It’s that time again! September has begun and with it, my two month run up to Halloween. I like Halloween, and I like the Halloween run up. I also like this time of year because I don’t really have to think about my schedule for the next four months. Halloween movies in September and October, movie suggestions in November, and then the VEWPRF stuff in December. The only real question is do I do reviews with a theme or just toss out a bunch of appropriate movies? Well, this year, we’re going with a theme. I’ve decided to review one of my favorite genres, the Anthology Movie. I have no idea why, but there seems to be more horror anthology out there than other kinds. Maybe I’ve got a selective eye on this and just forget all the things that aren’t horror, but it feels like there are more horror anthologies out there. Either way, we’re going to spend from now until November checking them out! So let’s start with…

TITLE PAGE!

Cat’s Eye (1985 DEG Dir. Lewis Teague)

Around the time Stephen King was getting ready to make Maximum Overdrive, The De Laurentiis Entertainment Group was making another King movie. This one was, as far as I can tell, the second of three movies that De Laurentiis and King would make together. The first being Firestarter and the last being Maximum Overdrive. Like Firestarter, this also has Drew Barrymore in it and like the other two films it was shot in and around Wilmington, North Carolina. It’s also directed by the man who directed Cujo, so there is a strong contingent of King Veterans in this movie. It contains two stories from Nightshift and a story that, again as far as I can tell, was just written for the screenplay for this movie.